How to ‘Hook Up’ When You’re Over 30
Your life is changing. You’ve hit mid-life, you’re are going through a divorce, your children are adults and you realize you could be alone.
Maybe you join a dating website or you go online to your social media account*, strike up conversations with old classmates, who may be going through the same life changes you are. You have a mutual upset and connect. Maybe this is someone you had a crush on in high school, but didn’t have the self confidence then, whereas now you do. One chat leads to another. Cell phone numbers are exchanged. The texting begins.
Before you know it, you are meeting this person. You are excited and feel so good about yourself. You feel like a high-schooler again. Remember what it was like to go on your first date? For some of you, it may have been decades ago. Let yourself be happy, nervous and aroused.
But before you do meet, make sure to follow some basic rules; and make sure to share your concepts upfront with your date.
Better safe than sorry., Whether you knew this person twenty years ago or they are a new friend, you don’t really know the person well enough to feel completely safe. Meet in a restaurant for lunch. Get to know the person a little better before jumping into bed.
Always come prepared
No pun intended, but make sure you are prepared for a sexual encounter. You need to rely on yourself even if the other person promises they have it covered. In all the excitement and anticipation, sometimes people forget the little details. You don’t want to find yourself in a situation where you can’t continue on right at the heat of the moment.
Make sure someone you trust knows where you are, and even who you will be with. Just another safety measure. Maybe you can even pull the old ‘phone call from someone important’ routine. Have your trusted friend call you at a certain point. Just make sure you are available to answer.
Live your fantasy
Always had a fantasy that your ex-spouse wasn’t interested in doing? Why not bring up the idea with this person? Sometimes it is easier to have this sexual illusion with your hook-up buddy. You may feel less restrictive and more comfortable.
Keep open lines of communication
Stay in touch with the person. Maybe make this a week/monthly meeting. This allows you the chance to live out some deep hidden dreams, develop a new friendship and have some lovin’ that every one deserves. Plus as the relationship progresses, you can add new adventures (role playing, naughty talk and more people). You don’t have to keep the meeting solely to your re-acquaintance. You have a fantasy, and chances are your new partner shares the same idea. Talk about it and if you do, why not go one step further. Find a third person to share the new found relationship with on an adult match making website.
Prepping prior to meeting
Let yourself loose and have a little texting or phone sex. Hype up the meeting. Get yourself as well as the person you are meeting riled up. This will make the meeting (when ready) for a private setting that much more anticipated.
*According to Pewinternet.com in January 2014, 30-49 year-olds were tied for the top percentage of social media users.