You may have encountered a person or spent time with them only to feel exhausted and overwhelmed afterward. You may not have realized it at the time but they could be an energy vampire who has drained you of all your emotional energy. This article explores the different kinds of energy vampires and how to deal with them.

What are energy vampires?

Energy vampires is a term used to describe people who drain the emotional or psychic energy of others. These individuals are often characterized as being excessively needy, self-centered, and lacking empathy. They feed off the emotional or psychological energy of those around them, leaving their victims feeling exhausted, drained, or emotionally depleted.

Energy vampires can manifest in various ways and may exhibit different behaviors. Some common types include:

  1. The Victim: These individuals constantly complain, seek sympathy, and demand attention. They often play the role of the helpless victim to elicit emotional support from others. The victim energy vampire will often blame someone else for their problems and will never take accountability for any situation.
  1. The Narcissist: Narcissistic energy vampires are self-absorbed and crave constant admiration and validation. They drain others’ energy by constantly seeking attention, dominating conversations, and disregarding others’ needs. The narcissistic energy vampire will constantly try to compete with you because they always need to be the center of attention. They will struggle to feel genuine happiness for you and will drain your energy to fulfill their emotional needs.
  1. The Drama Queen/King: These individuals thrive on creating drama and chaos. They exaggerate situations, blow things out of proportion, and provoke emotional reactions from others, all of which drain the energy of those around them. They are always involved in some kind of catastrophe and exert dramatic behavior in the hopes that you will come to their aid.
  1. The Controller: Controllers are highly manipulative and exert their power over others. They often use guilt, intimidation, or emotional blackmail to get what they want, leaving their victims feeling drained and powerless. The controlling energy vampire will often use your sensitive and compassionate nature to their advantage by monopolizing your time knowing that you’ll feel guilty turning them down.
  1. The Chronic Complainer: These individuals have a negative outlook on life and constantly focus on what’s wrong. They drain energy by incessantly complaining, criticizing, and finding fault in everything. They are usually insecure and therefore would constantly complain or criticize you to make you insecure too.

How to deal with energy vampires

Energy vampires can be a lot to deal with and could drain you of all your resources which could affect your well-being. Therefore it is important to recognise their behaviors and create a suitable approach to deal with them. Here are a few ideas on how to deal with energy vampires.

  1. Create boundaries – Make yourself comfortable with the word “no”. Determine to what extent you want them in your life and limit your interactions with them. For example, you may decide to only see them in group social settings with mutual friends.
  1. Limit your energy supply – Energy vampires will use verbal and non-verbal cues to bait you to open yourself up to their demands. To reserve your energy you could choose not to supply them with your energy by limiting your facial expressions, body language, or verbal response.
  1. Adjust your expectations – You cannot change an energy vampire, you can only change your expectations of them. Therefore you should not expect anything from them but to drain your energy. Knowing this you could decide to not allow them to use you as a problem dumping site or not to give them the time or space to drain your energy.
  1. Go “no contact” – If you can’t create boundaries or adjust your expectations and avoid your energy vampire you may need to consider cutting them off entirely. If nothing else has worked for you, removing your energy vampire from your life may be the best solution for your well-being.

It is important to note that while some individuals may exhibit energy-draining behaviors from time to time, labeling someone as an energy vampire should be done cautiously. Remember, each situation and relationship is unique, so it’s important to evaluate what strategies work best for you and adapt them accordingly. Ultimately, prioritizing your own well-being and maintaining healthy boundaries is crucial when dealing with energy vampires.

NBC News